Inspired.

I have told many people in my life that one of the reasons I love Behavioral Psychology so much is because I believe that God created the human intellect and therefore the behavioral studies that Psychology examines are very much consistent with God's word! HOW COOL IS THAT? So many concepts that I learned in my Psychology classes are things also found in the Bible! I believe that is because God created us and knows best how we "work." The Bible existed long before Psychology did... so I am going to use the Bible as the launching pad for discussing some of these Psychological research findings.

I realize that the intellectuals among us may call this confirmation bias, and perhaps this is true. But my blogging is not an effort to convince you that scripture is true (though I hope it may challenge your perspective). I already admit am biased because of my faith. Rather, as an overflow of my own exciting discoveries, I hope to simply share God's word with you and show you how the science of the mind backs up the scriptural text.

For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God. Romans 8:19-20

"The church has many organizers, but few
agonizers; many who pay, but few who pray;
many resters, but few wrestlers; many who
are enterprising, but few who are interceding.
People who are not praying are playing.
Two prerequisites of dynamic Christian living
are vision and passion. Both of these are
generated by prayer. The ministry of preaching
is open to a few. The ministry of praying is open
to every child of God. …
Tithes may build the church, but tears will
give it life. That is the difference between the
modern church and the early church. Our
emphasis is on paying, theirs was on praying.
When we have paid, the place is taken. When
they had prayed, the place was shaken (Acts
4:31).
In the matter of effective praying, never have
so many left so much to so few. Brethren, let us
pray."
- Leonard Ravenhill

I love this quote, so I thought I'd share it.

A friend challenged me recently, "Are you completely real in your blog? I'm just asking because sometimes it seems like you struggle more with these thoughts in real life than you seem to in your blog."

I'll admit, she's correct. If I come across as "having it all together" that is FALSE. Most of the thoughts here are wrestled over and incomplete. In truth, my life is extremely MESSY. I do not in anyway, shape, or form have everything figured out and I am still very much in process. I fail at believing these truths I mention on a consistent basis and the constant prayer I come back to is "I believe, help my unbelief (Mark 9:24)!"

Just wanted to lay that out there before we go any further. The good news is, I am blood-bought and grace-taught... over and over again.

Is it worth it?

Occasionally the thought crosses my mind that being a missionary is uncomfortable. Having a real job with a consistent income and more measurable results appeals to me right now as I wonder if what I am doing is making ANY difference whatsoever in student's lives and as I struggle through trusting God to provide for my financial needs.

But Christ changes everything. Including my perspective.

In the Christmas message I see another missionary who struggled with His calling (Luke 22:44). Leaving the most comfortable home ever (Revelation 21:11), he came to reside in unholy and inadequate living conditions, with hay as a mattress (Luke 2:12) and an unsanitary barn where there were probably bed-bugs or at least mice, I imagine.

He also left the greatest community and perfect family (Matthew 27:45-46). Within the trinity, Jesus had every relational need perfectly met (Matthew 3:16-17). As a missionary, he was rejected by his imperfect family (Mark 3:21) and separated from those he loved (Mark 14:53). He was outcasted from his hometown and rejected by his closest community (Mark 15:13).

Jesus left his perfect home, perfect peace, perfect family, perfect community... for me. His only joy was that set before him... the cross. The railroad track between God's throne and my slums. Jesus became a missionary so that He could take me back home with Him. I'm a missionary so I can bring some of my friends with me. According to God, I'm worth the sacrifice. And so are you.

I will not offer to God that which costs me nothing. (2 Samuel 24:24)

A Puzzling Sort of Christmas

It's a Christmas tradition to get the puzzles out this time of year. We sit around the coffee table, eat popcorn, and become mesmerized by the challenge of putting together 1000 pieces of scattered chaos. In my family, the task is completed silently, all of us concentrating hard on our corner of the rectangular puzzle.

Also puzzling me now is the subtle uneasiness in my heart as Christmas approaches this year. A "funk" has fallen over me that I can't seem to shake. My family and friends keep asking, "What are you going to do after you finish your internship next year?" And to that, I cannot answer. Honestly, I have so many options and I feel so little direction right now!

But I am reminded that there is a Christmas promise I can rest on. In Matthew 1:23, Jesus is named "Emmanuel," meaning "God, with us."

Despite my uneasiness about my future, I can rest on the fact that God is most certainly with me in this season of Christmas, and this season of life. I am just a piece in a puzzle that God is putting together (Jeremiah 18:1-10). And though it may look chaotic now, there is a viewpoint from the one above who has the finished product in mind (Jeremiah 29:11, Revelation 4:11).

Love God well. Love People well.

Back in October, UNCC had an outreach called “Reverse-trick-or treat” where we passed out candy and used surveys to invite students into spiritual conversations. On that night, I talked to a young woman named Abby who was NOT interested in anything having to do with God. Of course, I didn’t want to push so I simply said, “Hey, here’s my number. If you are ever interested in exploring spiritual things, give me a call and I’d love to get to know you better.”

About a week ago, I got a text from Abby! She was doing a project in one of her classes and wanted to know if she could interview me to get a Christian’s perspective on some hot-topics in society. During our meeting, I was able to gently share the gospel with her and I learned that she actually has a lot of personal questions about God, but she has never met a Christian who didn’t judge her based on her beliefs. At the end of our time together I asked Abby if she would want to get together regularly for coffee and try to explore some of these questions that she has about God. We are going to start meeting regularly in January! Please pray for God to give me wisdom and compassion as I begin this journey with Abby. And pray that she would come to believe the life-changing message of Jesus Christ!

Would You Please Consider?

I am thrilled that the Lord has called me to lead a team of college students on a mission trip to Dakar, Senegal this summer May 20-June 30! Of course, with that calling, comes a financial need of $5,000. This is in addition to my current monthly need, which has increased because some of my previous financial supporters are no longer able to give financially.

In this season of giving, would you consider joining my financial support team monthly as I continue to invest in college students lives? Would you consider offering a one-time donation to support my trip to Senegal?

You can give online: give.ccci.org

Account number: 0632459

Half Marathon! Here I come...

http://www.charlotteracefest.com/

Who's gonna join me?? April 14, 2012

Why Are We Faking It?

Sometimes we talk about it like its easy. We plaster a smile on our face and go into church like everything is nice and neat with a pretty little bow tied on top. Besides, it's that season. We fake it because we're "supposed to be smiling" at Christmastime.

Let's be honest, today was one of those days for me. I didn't want to go to church this morning. Wow, yes, me... the "super Christian" wanted to stay in bed and sleep. I've been going so fast lately, and I selfishly felt like I haven't had anytime for myself.

When I got to church, Pastor Larry talked about true authenticity... it's not until now that I am processing fully what he meant: Jesus doesn't teach a "fake it till you make it" sermon. He doesn't say tie yourself up like a nice little present and then come to me. Jesus says, "Come to me all you who are weary and heavy burdened, and I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28)." Then, to make his point clear, he hung out with the ones who didn't have it all together! In a sense, Jesus says, "I'll meet YOU where you're at... and bring you to a better place." Bring your selfishness, your bad attitude, tiredness, burdens, and frustrations to the cross and let me change your heart.

So what am I doing pretending like I have it all together when I don't? No one wants to go to church with a hypocrite... so I need to stop acting like one. I'm laying down the super Christian title for one that's more accurate and honest: "Blood-bought and grace-taught."

"Spend Yourself"

Looking at my bank account earlier today, I realized that I don't have a whole lot of money to spend during the month of December this year. As much as I would love to buy everyone some awesome Christmas presents, I'm a little low on cash flow right now.

But then I came across Isaiah 58:10 where God asks His people to spend themselves on behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed. I realized that tradition of giving at Christmastime isn't all about depleting my bank account on behalf of the people I love (or the people I feel obligated to buy something for). The gifts God wants me to give are more sacrificial than that.

God asks me to SPEND MYSELF. Who is hungry in my life right now? I know of some college students that I am investing in are hungry for the word of God. I know my church offers opportunities to feed the hungry. I know there are people all around me who are hungry for a taste of God's love through my hands. And so, I've decided to spend myself during the month of December, whether in service or words... I am going to tangibly stop frivolously spending so much money and start spending myself. I'll let you know how that goes.

"Do We Think That is Tacky?"

My neighbors put up enough Christmas lights to light up the entire Galloway Forest. Complete with the countdown to Christmas (20 days, 1 hour, 35 minutes and 15 seconds... I kid you not, it is that specific)! As Luke picked me up last night, he said to me, "Do we think that is tacky?" I laughed because some people are nuts with their enthusiasm about holidays. I am all for lights, don't get me wrong. But when you have so many lights that Rudolf's nose is sniffing baby Jesus... you need more to do with your life.

I wonder sometimes if spend so much of our time wrapped up in Christmas lights and decorating that we forget to spend time being the light! Jesus said, "Let your light shine before all men that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven (Matthew 5:16)."

Hmm... good deeds. It's odd to me that in Christian circles "good deeds" have developed a bad reputation. It's true that for some, they've become a stumbling block to understanding the true gospel: that it is NOT by works (good deeds) that you have been saved, but the gift of God (Eph. 2:8-9)!

But after that... after we are saved by grace through faith... there is a calling! A calling to holiness and a calling to be like Christ! And every calling demands a response. The calling? "Let your light shine before men so that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven!" What is your response?

Warning: Too much light may make some think you are tacky and may cause rejection from judgmental neighbors (John 15:18-20). But Jesus is worth the cost.

All the Tinsel and Lights Make the Holidays Bright... but the Real Gift is You!

Friday night I had the wonderful opportunity to host and attend the "Snowball!" A Christmas dance party for all of the Cru students around the Charlotte area, complete with yummy Christmas cookies and a photo booth (How cute is that picture of Luke and I??)! We had a blast with the 65+ students welcoming in the season of Christmas and the celebration of the birth of Jesus with dancing and quality fellowship!

Not only do I love Christmas parties, I also enjoy the smell of evergreens, the beauty of Christmas lights, and the taste of gingerbread lattes! A Christmas in Charlotte, North Carolina is full of all of these! Unfortunately, it can also full of distraction and busyness.

Yesterday, Pastor Stephen from my church, Elevation, challenged us to make a declaration and commitment for this advent season:

"I won't get lost in lesser things... I will make the most of Jesus."

Martha was so distracted by "lesser things"... the preparations and the hard work... that she missed out on the whole reason for the party in the first place (Luke 10:10)! She had invited the guests, but was too busy preparing the meal to enjoy time with them.

I don't want to miss out on spending time at the feet of the One who is the reason for this season! Whether that looks like worshiping God by a lighted evergreen tree, drinking a gingerbread latte while reading the Christmas story, or spending time dancing with college students... I choose to not only invite Jesus into my home and heart, but also enjoy his presence this Christmas!

We Should Get Jerseys...

Cause We Make a Good Team!

On Sunday evening my wonderful boyfriend, Luke, showed up at my door to take me on a date! And he had a plan! Putting the effort in to make a plan beforehand always makes me feel extra cared for. And, as usual, Luke went above and beyond! He didn't just have any plan... he had a well thought out plan to help me accomplish #4 on my bucket list! Complete with telling me to wear the right shoes to walk to the light rail without hurting my feet! A great reflection of Christ's love toward me, Luke knows me and pursues my heart with intentionality! And he does so really well!

However, as great of a pursuer as he is, Luke is not Christ. I like fairy tales, but Luke is not the one designed to "complete me." I can't look to Luke to make sense of my world! To expect him to do so is to put pressure on him that he was not designed to carry.

I hate to admit this, but sometimes I find myself putting him on this pedestal. And those are the times that he epically fails at living up to my unspoken and unrealistic expectations! Not to mention the times that I wind up working so hard to gain his attention and approval that I end up exhausted, insecure, and empty!

To make Luke my god is to forfeit the grace and rest (Jonah 2:8) that comes from being perfectly pursued by my first love (Revelation 2:4). Unconditional (Psalm 36:7, Psalm 48:9) and eternal (Psalm 52:8), God's love is SO much more satisfying.

In Christ alone, my hope is found.

He is my light, my strength, my song.

This cornerstone, this solid ground,

Firm through the fiercest drought and storm.

I have a friend, LeAnne Rice, who recently wrote a book called "Untangling Christmas!" A guide to planning the holidays with Christ at the center! Check it out here: www.untanglingchristmas.org

This just in: I am going to Senegal, Africa this summer as a summer project director! Cannot WAIT! Who wants to come with me??

The goal of missions is the global worship of Jesus by his redeemed people from every tribe, tongue, and nation. The outcome of missions is all peoples delighting to praise Jesus. And the motivation for missions is the enjoyment that his people have in him. Missions aims at, brings about, and is fueled by the worship of Jesus!

-David Mathis in Holy Ambition

I was in Argentina for a mission trip and I had simply been walking to campus to share the gospel with college students, when I noticed an odd stoplight on the side of a garage door. It wasn't directing traffic so I asked, "What is that stoplight for?" The answer literally brought me to my knees and I kneeled there in the middle of the crowded street, weeping and praying while passerby's just gawked at me, a crazy American. It was a brothel; the light was directing traffic of a much different kind.

It was on that crowded street in Argentina that my heart first broke for women trapped by the sex-trafficking industry. Only a sophomore in college at the time, I couldn't even begin to see the enormity of the situation. In fact, it was my first encounter with any information regarding sex slavery. And so, I prayed for God to eliminate sex-trafficking. To abolish human slavery today.

Later, I learned that there are 1.39 million victims of commercial sex trafficking worldwide and that human trafficking for sexual exploitation generates approximately 27.8 billion USD per year (http://www.thea21campaign.org/the-problem.php).

Somewhere in the 4 years since that moment, I picked up the lie that eliminating sex-trafficking is impossible, and so I stopped praying. I stopped believing that THE GOD OF THE UNIVERSE can actually do something about this situation. I am thought to be a "super Christian", so it's hard to confess that to the millions of people that read my blog (okay, 8 people). But I have been recently reminded that if I really believed that God is really real and omnipotent, I would be bold to ask for the elimination of the sex trade industry. I may be overwhelmed at the details involved in that, but God is not.

Listen, the Lord's hand is not so short that it cannot save; Nor is His ear so dull that it cannot hear (Isaiah 59:1).

Don't You Dare Close Your Eyes!

"Do you trust me? Do you trust me?" Aladdin's eyes invite Jasmine to place her confidence in him. As she hesitantly chooses to place her hand in his, my heart silently applauds.

Women, isn't it interesting that our hearts applaud trust in fairytales but has the opposite reaction in real life? In real life, my heart fights and screams and says, "No! Don't trust! This is dangerous and risky! This could hurt! You could FALL OFF that carpet!"

When I think to the heart applause during that moment of the romantic Disney movie, I realize that we are CREATED to trust (Proverbs 3:5). Originally, God designed for us to be able to trust Him and to trust each other (Genesis 2:25). But sin makes that difficult. Past hurt makes that difficult. And each time our trust is wrongly placed or taken advantage of, we become more jaded. Walls go up where they were never intended to be.

What would it look like for me to place my hand in His and risk getting on the carpet? A small and hesitant voice from Jasmine, "yes," reminds me that it is all worth the risk! Don't you dare close your eyes- open them wide and step with wisdom and confidence onto the carpet God is laying out ahead of you!

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable." - CS Lewis

Girl's Night Out

"Earlier today, at least half of you enjoyed a tall vanilla skinny latte from Starbucks. Much like the cup that you threw away, you may have picked up a label somewhere along this journey through life that said you are 'usable,' that you can be consumed and used, only to be left broken with shame as your only companion."

Marion Jordan's words hit straight to the heart. As 120 women from UNCC rolled into Rowe 130 from 6 different sororities, we were ALL squirming. As much as we would hate to admit it, we've been that coffee cup. We have experienced the loneliness that comes from rejection, and the shame that comes from being “thrown away.”

Often I do one of two things with those wounds. I either isolate, vowing to never let anyone else close enough to cause that sort of pain again, or I let myself grow apathetic and numb. In numbness, I let myself be used as the coffee cup. I claim, “Whatever. Use me. I don’t care. Why should I care?” Thoughts which couldn't be farther from the truth.

Whether in isolation or apathy, my heart desperately longs to hear, “You matter way more than you think you do (Genesis 2:7). You are worth far more than you think you are (John 3:16). I accept you just the way you are, and I love you enough to carry you somewhere better (Hebrews 10:22).”

There's a Hole in the Bucket, Dear Henry.

I may be a little behind on the Bucket List Craze... For a little while, I thought it might be sacrilegious to have playful goals other than to Love God and Love People (Luke 10:27). However, upon further review, I believe I can do all things to God's glory (Colossians 3:23). I'll start with these things:

1) Visit all 50 states in the US

2) Learn to ballroom dance, salsa dance, and swing dance.

3) See the Rockefeller Christmas tree in New York

4) Ride the light rail in Charlotte

5) Backpack across Europe and share the gospel

6) Learn a foreign language fluently

7) Take my children to a Disney fireworks show

8) Memorize an entire book of the Bible

9) Read the entire Chronicles of Narnia

10) Spend a year or more in overseas missions

11) Watch Providence choir perform at the Blumenthal Performing Arts Center

12) Run a half marathon

13) Learn to cook an entire Thanksgiving meal from scratch, like my mom can!

14) Learn to play Bridge

15) Learn to play Penuckle

16) Make a legit piece of pottery

17) Go to graduate school

18) Refinish a piece of furniture

19) Own a dog and name him Leviticus

20) Own a bonsai tree

21) Buy a rundown house and fix it up to live in

22) See a broadway play

23) Learn to snowboard

“If we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desire not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, we are like ignorant children who want to continue making mud pies in a slum because we cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a vacation at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.” - CS Lewis

Garments of Praise-

I went shopping with Alexa and my mom yesterday and was struck by the materialism in my world. We were stopped by a foreign man wanting desperately to sell a straightener. Each time I would refuse to buy, he would lower the price a little more to keep me interested. I wondered to myself, "How low would this price continue to go just to keep me here?" When he got to his lowest offered price he begged me not to tell my friends.

Faith isn't cheap (Hebrews 11:17-19). God doesn't lower the price for me (Hebrews 12:3-4) and tell me not to tell my friends. In fact, He asks me to give EVERYTHING I have, and tell everyone I know (Mark 16:15-16)! I don't have to pretend that accepting Christ is easy or cheap. It isn't cheap for me (Romans 13:11-14), and it wasn't cheap for Christ (John 19:30).

Don't offer to God that which costs you nothing (2 Samuel 24:24).

“Cheap grace is the grace we bestow on ourselves. Cheap grace is the preaching of forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without church discipline, Communion without confession.... Cheap grace is grace without discipleship, grace without the cross, grace without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate.”
― Dietrich Bonhoeffer, The Cost of Discipleship